Forgiveness can be incredibly difficult to put into practice, especially when the hurt is deep. But what does true forgiveness look like according to the Bible? Let’s take a journey through Scripture to unpack the essence of true forgiveness, its foundations, and its transformative power.
The Essence of True Forgiveness
True forgiveness, according to the Bible, is an act of Grace that mirrors God’s own heart. It’s more than just letting go of anger or resentment; it’s an intentional, often challenging decision to release someone from the debt of their wrongdoing and not hold it against them. This kind of forgiveness isn’t about whether the person deserves it; it’s about your willingness to extend Grace, just as God does.
That said, it’s not wrong to ask yourself whether or not this person deserves forgiveness. But at the end of the day, you’ll find it doesn’t really matter. God knows us better than we know ourselves. I believe this is one of the major reasons He Loves us unconditionally. This is why God is willing to forgive when we genuinely ask for it.
If we practice Compassion and understand what it means to Love our neighbors as ourselves, Grace and forgiveness come naturally as a result.
Diving into the Bible’s Teachings
The Bible is rich with teachings and examples that highlight the importance and nature of true forgiveness.
1. God’s Forgiveness as the Blueprint
God’s forgiveness is the gold standard. Throughout the Bible, we see God’s Mercy in action. Psalm 103:12 says, “As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.” This verse beautifully illustrates how complete God’s forgiveness is. He erases our sins entirely, as if they never existed in the first place.
When you forgive, keep in mind that you are completely freeing this other person from the debt of their wrongdoing. You can’t hold them to it anymore.
2. Jesus on Forgiveness
Jesus’ teachings on forgiveness are revolutionary. In Matthew 6:14-15, Jesus lays it out plainly: “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” This passage underscores a critical point: our forgiveness from God is linked to our willingness to forgive others.
I see this as a means of describing the nature of Love and Compassion. You must be willing to be the forgiveness you expect from others. Be the Love, Compassion, Joy, and Grace you want for yourself. Be that for others, because you want that for others.
3. The Parable of the Unforgiving Servant
Matthew 18:21-35 brings us the Parable of the Unforgiving Servant, a story that drives home the expectation of extending Mercy. Peter asks Jesus how many times he should forgive someone… seven times? Jesus responds, “Not seven times, but seventy-seven times,” emphasizing limitless forgiveness.
The parable shows a servant forgiven a massive debt who then refuses to forgive a fellow servant’s smaller debt. The master’s harsh rebuke to the unforgiving servant highlights that we must extend the same Mercy we receive.
In many ways, this echoes my sentiments about the purpose of number 2 above.
4. Jesus’ Ultimate Example
Jesus didn’t just preach forgiveness; He lived it. As He hung on the cross, enduring unimaginable pain, He prayed, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34). Even in His darkest hour, Jesus chose to forgive, showing us the depth of true forgiveness.
This, to me, is one of the most powerful examples of what forgiveness and Grace really are. Even as He suffered, Jesus forgave His torturers, almost as if He understood their suffering too. I think about this constantly. Even when it would seem reasonable to be angry and vengeful, I should offer Grace and forgiveness.
Characteristics of True Forgiveness
True forgiveness, according to the Bible, has some key characteristics:
- Unconditional: Biblical forgiveness doesn’t depend on the offender’s actions. It’s a choice to release the debt regardless of whether the offender asks for it.
- Complete: When God forgives, He wipes the slate clean. True forgiveness means fully letting go of the offense and not bringing it up again.
- Transformative: Forgiveness has the power to transform relationships and hearts, breaking the cycle of resentment and opening the door to healing.
- Reflective of God’s Grace: True forgiveness mirrors God’s Grace. It’s an act of Love that shows the forgiveness we’ve received from God.
Steps to True Forgiveness
Forgiving as the Bible teaches can be tough, but it’s possible with God’s help. Here’s how to start:
- Acknowledge the Hurt: Don’t minimize your pain. Recognizing the hurt is the first step toward healing.
- Pray for Strength: Ask God for the strength to forgive. Remember, forgiveness is a divine act, and we need His help.
- Choose to Forgive: Forgiveness is a decision, not a feeling. Decide to forgive, even if you don’t feel like it. (If you act like you mean it and follow through, you may actually find you do mean it).
- Let Go of Resentment: Release the anger and bitterness. Trust that God will bring justice in His own time. But keep in mind that God’s justice doesn’t necessarily look like we think it should.
- Seek Reconciliation: If possible, mend the relationship. This might involve tough conversations, but it’s a step toward healing.
- Repeat as Necessary: Forgiveness is often a process, not a one-time event. Be patient with yourself as you work through it, and be patient with the person to whom you have given it.
Called To Forgive
The Bible’s teachings on forgiveness are clear: we are called to forgive others as God has forgiven us. It’s a command that challenges us to rise above our natural inclinations and reflect the character of Christ. Through forgiveness, we find freedom, healing, and restored relationships. By embracing this difficult yet transformative practice, we draw closer to God and become conduits of His Grace in a hurting world.
Now What?
Forgiveness And Healing
Whether you’re seeking forgiveness, offering it, or simply trying to understand what it really means, this book meets you exactly where you are. And walks with you from there.
Drawing from biblical truths, real-life stories, and a little irreverent humor (because let’s be honest, healing is hard enough), this book offers practical steps and heartfelt insights for anyone trying to let go of past hurts.
Currently available on Kindle, Paperback, Hardcover or Signed.
If you’ve ever thought, “I can’t forgive them,” or “I can’t forgive myself,”, this book is for you.