[ Listen on Apple Podcasts ] [ Other Options ]
Explore how God’s Love reshapes the way we see others. Learn to Love with His heart and reflect His infinite Compassion.
It’s easy to think of yourself as the protagonist of your own story, the focal point of your life. I do it all the time. Kind of like I’m living my own Truman Show. Nothing terrifying about that. But then you remember that God, the creator of the universe, Loves every other person as much as He Loves you. Not just your best friend, or your mom, but the guy who cut you off in traffic this morning (even though he was jogging way too fast for 8am)! The coworker who drives you nuts. The person who hurt you. And that, well, that’s something to wrestle with.
When God Loves the People We Don’t
Have you ever been in the position where a friend you Love cherishes someone you don’t care for? Or worse, someone you actively dislike? It’s one of those awkward tensions where you feel like there’s a gap between you and your friend.
Think about that for a second.
When I was in high school I was crazy about this girl. Let’s call her Max. I could have called her Steve but that would have been weird. Max and I had kind of a will-they-won’t-they relationship growing up. Okay, it was more like I was chasing after her for four years. And since we were part of the same group of friends, we were around each other a lot. So, between the regular socializing and the get-togethers and her daily dose of woo juice (courtesy moi) she knew me pretty well. She knew my heart, my values, and I daresay she probably even Loved me. But it was more like “I Love you… just stay over there.”
I thought quite highly of Max. She was smart, strong, didn’t cut me off in traffic, and somehow knew how to garner respect and admiration from those around her.
But Max also Loved her best friend… Steve; the girl who gossiped, the one who snubbed her own friends at parties, who was manipulative and nasty, and who never had a kind word to say.
If Max was everything I thought she was (and she was) how could she Love someone like that? How could she Love both of us?
When we frame this scenario through human relationships, it’s uncomfortable. I wanted Max to see Steve the way I did: flawed, maybe even toxic. But Max didn’t. She saw something else, something worth Loving.
Now let’s put God in Max’s shoes.
God is not just your friend, though He is the best one you could have. He’s also the friend of Steve. Steve, the annoying coworker. Steve, the person who let you down. Steve, the girl who told everyone you sleep with a Pound Puppy at night. And He Loves them just as much as He Loves you.
Suddenly, you’re in unfamiliar territory. You’re not the only one Loved, cherished, valued. Everyone is. And that’s hard to swallow.
The Danger of Rejecting Those God Loves
Let’s face it: we like exclusivity. Even if we won’t admit it out loud, we often operate with the assumption that Love is a zero-sum game. We expect that the more Love God has for others, the less He has for us. We crave that special place in someone’s heart. It’s a human instinct to want to be the one. But darn it, God’s Love doesn’t work that way.
The real problem is what happens when you reject the ones God Loves. You may think you’re justified. After all, not everyone is easy to Love, right? We can be dismissive, self-righteous, thinking, I’m the good one here. Surely God sees that. Surely He must agree with me.
But here’s the tough pill: if you reject what God treasures—another person—you are rejecting a piece of God’s heart. And what if someone else, looking at your worst moments, feels the same way about you? What if, through someone else’s eyes, you are that “unlovable” person?
Well… shit.
It’s painful to think that the judgments we cast on others could just as easily be cast on us. Maybe you’ve been on the receiving end of that already. Have you ever been dismissed, misunderstood, or rejected by someone who doesn’t see your worth? How does that feel? Now imagine God in that moment, seeing all sides, Loving everyone in spite of it all. How often do we reject the people He calls beloved?
Seeing God’s Love Reflected in Others
So where does that leave us? If we know that God’s Love is not confined by our perceptions and if we understand that rejecting someone God Loves means rejecting a part of ourselves, how do we move forward?
The possibility lies in reorienting our understanding of Love. God’s Love is infinite, not scarce. It’s not just that He Loves you as much as He Loves others but that His Love for you is intertwined with His Love for them. It’s all connected.
Imagine you’re holding a prism up to the light. Each facet reflects the brilliance of that light in a different way, but it’s all the same source. You and the people you struggle to Love are facets of that prism. God’s Love shines through all of you, creating different colors, angles, and perspectives. None of it diminishes the beauty of another part of the prism.
When we start to see others as reflections of God’s Love, the impossible becomes possible. Suddenly, there’s room for Grace. There’s room for patience. There’s even room for a kind of Love you didn’t think you could muster.
That person you find difficult to tolerate? They become an invitation; an invitation to practice seeing through God’s eyes, to practice Loving with God’s heart. And in doing so, you might find you’re not just transforming your relationship with them. You’re transforming your relationship with yourself.
Scary. But also kind of beautiful, right? If only I’d thought if this stuff back when I was in high school.
Moving From Self-Centered to God-Centered Love
Conversion here isn’t about changing your beliefs. It’s about changing your heart. It’s about a shift from self-centered Love to God-centered Love.
When you acknowledge that God Loves others as much as He Loves you, it’s like taking a deep breath and letting go of the need to be “the favorite.” There’s no more competition. There’s no need for comparisons. Instead, you become a vessel for God’s Love to flow through, to everyone, including yourself.
But how does that change the way you conduct yourself in daily life?
Start small. Begin by acknowledging the humanity in others, even those you dislike. When you feel judgment creeping in, pause and ask, How does God see this person? What does He Love about them? Surely, there must be something He Loves, so what is it?
This doesn’t mean you have to force yourself into close relationships with people who have hurt you or who are toxic. Healthy boundaries are important. But it does mean that you stop rejecting the idea that they, too, are beloved by God.
It means you allow room in your heart for Compassion, even if that Compassion looks more like empathy from a distance than a deep friendship. It means releasing the bitterness or judgment that keeps you separated from the very heart of God.
When you do this—when you truly open yourself up to the idea that God’s Love is as vast and boundless for others as it is for you—something shifts inside. You start to realize that Love isn’t diminished by being shared. In fact, it grows. The more you Love, the more Love there is.
And as you let that Love flow outward, you start to heal the parts of yourself that have been locked away by resentment or hurt. In learning to Love the “unlovable” in others, you discover how to Love the “unlovable” in yourself.
After all, isn’t that what God does every day?
So what about the fact that God Loves others as much as He Loves you?
Why wouldn’t He? Because in Loving them, He shows you how to Love yourself.
And that might just be the most powerful conversion of all.
Share
Have you ever had a friend who was besties with someone you didn’t particularly care for? How did that affect your friendship? Were you ever able to be, maybe not friends, but civil enough with this person that it didn’t cause a strain in your friendship? Did you ever tell your friend how you felt? After reading this article, how might you have behaved differently? Share your thoughts and experiences below!
