📖 Excerpted from God Jots: Forgiveness and Healing
Boundaries Aren’t Bitterness In A Cute Hat
There comes a point where you wonder if protecting yourself is the same thing as being unforgiving. If setting a boundary means you’re being less “Christlike”. But real forgiveness doesn’t ask you to hand yourself over to the same hurt again.
“Forgiveness isn’t something that’s just going to happen to the other person. This is something you have to actively participate in… you’re also attempting to invite something good into the person who wronged you. That’s a very powerful thing to have at your fingertips.”
“An invitation is a choice. This further aligns with the Christian notion of free will… As the person who has been wronged, you now, in a strange but beautiful way, have been given responsibility over this power, even if just temporarily.”
Boundaries don’t cancel Grace. They help protect it; yours and theirs.
Yes, You Can Forgive And Still Say “No”
Forgiveness and boundaries aren’t mutually exclusive. In fact, sometimes one makes the other possible.
“When we forgive, we let go of old hurts and grudges, making room for new growth and renewal in our spiritual lives. This renewal is a continual process, as we strive to embody God’s Love and Grace in our interactions with others.”
“By practicing forgiveness, we cultivate a spirit of Compassion, kindness, and humility, which deepens our spiritual journey and brings us closer to God.”
Letting go doesn’t mean letting someone walk back in without any accountability. It just means you’re not dragging the pain around like carry-on baggage.
The Lie of Unlimited Access
Grace doesn’t mean keeping your arms wide open to everyone all the time. Boundaries remind you that just because you’ve forgiven someone doesn’t mean you have to hand them the keys to your peace again.
“When we forgive others, we open ourselves to receive God’s forgiveness… allowing His Grace to flow freely into our lives (and into the lives of others).”
You’re not a bad Christian (or any human being, for that matter) for saying, “I need space.” You’re a growing one.
Loving From A Distance Is Still Love
Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is to Love someone from the other side of a reinforced emotional gate. And that’s okay.
“Remember how I said that if you focus on Loving your neighbor, the ‘Loving God with your whole heart’ part of the Greatest Commandment will come too? This is a great expression of that. By Loving and forgiving each other we show reverence to God, by truly appreciating His creations.”
Loving someone doesn’t mean unlimited access. It means reflecting God’s heart while also honoring your own limits.
Why This Book Speaks To The Burned-Out And Boundary-Wary
This book—in particular this part—is for anyone who’s felt torn between being a “good Christian” and protecting their peace. It’s also for the ones who’ve been told that forgiving means letting someone walk all over you, or that Love means sacrificing your well-being. It’s not.
Forgiveness is sacred, yes. But so is your emotional health. That’s what this part of the book is here to say: You don’t have to choose between freedom and self-respect. You can have both.
“Release Resentment: Make a conscious decision to let go of anger and resentment. This might require daily commitment and practice (it often does for me), but it’s essential for spiritual healing.”
God Jots: Forgiveness and Healing doesn’t hand you a checklist or a guilt trip. It gives you language for the tension you’re already living in. It offers Compassion where you’ve felt condemnation. And it reminds you that sometimes, the holiest thing you can do is draw a line and still choose Love.
If you’ve ever needed permission to say “I forgive you, but I also need space”, this is it.
Forgiveness And Healing
Whether you’re seeking forgiveness, offering it, or simply trying to understand what it really means, this book meets you exactly where you are. And walks with you from there.
Drawing from biblical truths, real-life stories, and a little irreverent humor (because let’s be honest, healing is hard enough), this book offers practical steps and heartfelt insights for anyone trying to let go of past hurts.